ESI Profile Angst

About a week ago, I promised the ESIs that I would write a profile for each one of them. I already wrote the Chair's profile a long time ago, something that has caused a big brouhaha. They all ask-- Why the Chair and not me?
Now, faced with the task of writing a profile for 4th Dwarf, Coyote, Conch Shell and the Independent Observer, I am experiencing a bad case of writer's block. Here is what it looks like in my head:

Me: Ok, Aggie. Time to start the profiles.
Me: Ok, which one first?
Me: Conch Shell? No, the IO. No, Coyote....No, Dwarfie.
Me: But, what are you going to say anyway?
Me: I don't have a fucking clue!
Me: But these are your friends. Surely, you have something interesting to say about your friends.
Me: But I want them to be interesting and to capture something unique about each ESI. You did it for the Chair.
Me: Yeah, and look where that got me!
Me: Just start writing.
Me: I don't want to! Stop telling me what to do!