Black Wardrobe

Some easy halloween costume ideas

1) go as the Green Shift. Easy. Just wear a green shift.

2) go as "up shit creek without a paddle". Easy. Wear brown clothing, a life jacket, and don't carry a paddle.

3) go as Todd Palin. (Everyone is going to be Sarah). Easy. Wear a skidoo suit and any hoser gear you have lying around the house.

4) go as a "work-in-progress". Easy. Different options here. Stick an empty frame around your head. Or, wrap yourself in one of your unfinished art projects.

5) no fifth costume idea.

Margaret Cho at the NAC + Liam Sullivan

I had the privilege of seeing Margaret Cho at the NAC last night. She's really something. Lots of sex talk which I discovered is a really positive way to start your week. And, the woman can do anything...I mean ANYTHING with a microphone. I was impressed.
Some highlights of the evening:
1) Her rant about Sarah Palin: How much she hates her, and yet how much she'd like to f- her. Nice. I guess we've all thought this? This is what comedians do, right? Tell us what we we've already thought... I hadn't actually thought about bedding Sarah Palin until she put it in my mind. It's now in my fantasy repertoire. Thanks, Margaret!
2) Her key to a successful marriage: F* as many people as you can. It takes a village to.... You get the picture. I'm not married, but I'm not convinced. I agree with the village part, but do we really need to screw them all? But, again, thanks for putting the ideas in my head!
3) Her declaration: "I'm not a lesbian; I'm not BI; I'm 'I'" This reminded me of how important Margaret Cho is breaking down some of those limiting identity politics. Thanks again, Margaret, for the liberation.

What I missed in the show was the subtlety and depth of Canada's own, Sandra Shamas. I missed her storytelling ability. Margaret Cho's show is more of an ADD manic sex show. Sandra Shamas somehow balances things off. She may be more on the depressive side of comedy, which makes her more appealing to me. I hope she comes back.

Back to the highlights, though. Kelly Liam Sullivan was the opening act, and he is just brilliant. Definitely inspiration for Astronaut Love Triangle. Apparently, this video has gone viral. I thought I was in touch with everything viral, but I guess not. Kelly Liam Sullivan is a genius. This one is worth checking out, too. Am I the only one who hasn't seen these?

Rose quilt

Lucinda in Montreal

Lucinda Williams is one of my idols, and I got the chance to see her at the Metropolis in Montreal on Thursday night. Lucinda could do pretty much anything and I would think she's wonderful. She is a rough, raw, edgy woman, and I love her for that. But, I have to admit, I was a little worried about her on Thursday. The chemical enhancement seemed a bit too...enhanced. I appreciated that she decided to scramble her set list. However, when she had to have a band huddle between each song, had to call the technician out on stage about ten times, and had to constantly turn her back to the audience to get grounded, I worried for her. I still love her, though. We regretted not being more stoned in solidarity. A highlight of the show was this song. "Hey my little honey bee, I'm so glad you stung me.".....Great stuff. She ended the whole show with an AC/DC cover: "It's a long way to the top (If ya wanna rock n' roll!)" Rock on, Lucinda!

Good news and bad news

The good news is Harper is on the downward slide.
The bad news is the stock market is on the downward slide.
The good news is the team of "Mavericks" seem to be also heading south.
The bad news is the Weltangst that follows me around despite all this positive political news.
The good news is I'm spending less time on line -- ie. not blogging.
The bad news is I'm not using all this wonderful non-blogging time to do fun and interesting things.
The good news is at least I'm aware of this.
The bad news is I'm not doing anything about it.
The good news is I'm thinking of getting a second cat.
The bad news is that I'm not planning to start cat blogging.

Manifestos

Reporting on the topic of non-blogging has grown old, so I'm going to write about something else.
Saw an interesting play at the NAC called Manifestes. I'm a big fan of Manifestos. The play had everything from the Communist Manifesto-- "Workers of the World Unite!" to the Manifesto of the FLQ to my personal favourite, the Dadaist Manifesto. Then, the Lieutenant Governor of New Brunswick, Hermenegilde Chiasson (who I am in love with) arrived on the stage at the end of the play to read his own manifesto, which was a kind of manifesto against manifestos. Very post-modern.
I love manifestos and plan to write my own, too. In fact, I think a good idea for the ESIs would be to have a Manifesto competition. Not sure what the prize would be.

Not Blogging So Far

So far not blogging has sent me into a downward spiral. I want to continue with this non-blogging experiment a bit longer, however. In the meantime, I've compiled a list of some advantages of blogging:

1) Blogging offers you an opportunity to rant about life's struggles. When you bottle it all up inside, you end up with back pain.
2) Blogging creates levity and tempers obsessive thoughts. Once you put your obsessive crap out there, you can laugh at it.
3) Blogging makes you look for funny bloggable moments. This leads to optimism.
4) Blogging keeps you out of trouble. If you are blogging, how much trouble can you get in, really?
5) There is no fifth.

Here are some things I've done instead of blogging:

1) I have canoed on the Rideau River. That was a good thing to do -- although I resented the fact that I can't swim in the river, and the swans piss me off.
2) I have worried about all the shit that's happening in the world: Sarah Palin (holy fuck!), Stephen Harper (holy fuck!), etc...
3) I have gone for a massage for a seized up back.
4) I have had some extended hypochondriac moments.
5) There is no fifth.

Blogging about not blogging

Dear blog readers,
I'm writing to let you know that in the upcoming weeks and months I will not be posting regularly. This is not a this-blog-is-coming-to-an-end posting. I will still be alive and well in the blogosphere.
However, I am experimenting with the idea of more off-line living. And, I intend to blog about this! So, please stay tuned.

Yours truly,

Aggie

International No-Blogging Month

I'm celebrating International No Blogging Month. See you all in September!

Today's retail discoveries

1) Habitat Restore. They have toilet tank lids for $10 in all sizes. It's a great store with friendly staff. The other customers are friendly, too. You could redo your whole kitchen, retile your bathroom...anything. It's all there, folks. No need for Home Depot.

2) I do not usually succumb to sales jobs... But I did to this one. If you walk in the Rideau Centre - main doors off Rideau street, pass the little store on the right, go up a couple of steps, pass the bank machines, you will arrive at some little stalls. A cute Israeli guy will ask for your hand. You give it to him. He puts some hand cream on it. You thank him. He then says: "You are natural woman. I see you keep your nails natural. I want to show you something." Then, he has me. He proceeds to file my nails with a kind of file block. After a few seconds of this filing process, it looks like I'm wearing a clear translucent polish. Think of all the money saved on manicures. Amazing! He tells me it will look beautiful like this for 2 weeks. And, the file block lasts for 2 years! Or, I can get my money back. He gave me a special special price and told me not to tell you. So, I won't.

Jesus in Kitten Fur

Have you seen this one?
I looked for Jesus in my cat's fur, but just found cat dandruff and Lauren Harper's face.

Aggie Update

I have not been in blogging mode/mood lately. Not much to report. The ESIs are giving me some support during this transition period, although they could be doing a whole lot more....

In other news: Scrabulous has been taken off Facebook. Thank God, Zoom weaned me off of Scrabulous and onto Scramble. I've taken to Scramble like a duck to water. Zoom continues to kick my ass.

I thought briefly today that I still "had it" after buying some new lip gloss called "Mango Juice", strutting my stuff on Bank Street, and receiving smiles from two attractive young men. Then, I realized my fly was down.

My cat

My cat went missing today, and is now found--locked in the next door neighbour's place. The neighbour's cat just died and left today with her owner to be buried in the country. The neighbour's cat hated my cat and tried to kill him every time they met. We made a point of keeping them apart. Somehow, while my neighbour was leaving with a freezer bag in hand, my cat slipped into her place. He has been wanting to get in there for a long long time. My cat never misses a meal, so when he didn't return, I assumed he was dead, too, and was bracing myself for a long period of mourning. But he's not dead. He's just trapped, we discovered when loud noises were heard over there. I sent dischevelled man over there with a screwdriver to break in, but he returned, saying he couldn't find a way to do it gracefully. He did manage to drop some dry cat food through the mail slot. We are not sure when the neighbour will return.

I Need a Toilet Top

No need to ask why, but can anyone tell me if and where I can buy just the top lid of a toilet. Not the seat lid, but the lid that covers the tank. I want ONLY the lid, not an entire toilet.

New Fabric

Isn't this nice? There is more. I bought $50 worth of fabric last weekend at a Montreal craft fair. I'm planning to make another quilt.

Feist sucked

I saw Feist last night. She wouldn't have sucked if she had been playing at the Manx or the Black Sheep Inn. But on the Main Stage of the Bluesfest, I didn't think she pulled it off, except for maybe the first 5 rows of people. She was doing her ambiant, artsy thing, which is pretty and everything, but doesn't work in that context. It annoyed me that she was a wanker last night. I wanted to see her rock, to be larger than life. I like Feist's schtick generally. Her voice is unique. The woman is capable of giving it when she wants to. But I'm over the whole 1, 2, 3, 4 shit.

Going Off Facebook

Zoom's delightful reruns made me take a look at what I was doing at this time last year. Tiana also does this on her blog (Congratulations, by the way, Tiana! Nice little fellow you got there).
Last year at this time I was just becoming a Facebook user and even had a mission statement worked out for myself. My year on Facebook has left me unsatisfied. Here are some reasons I'm going to go off Facebook:

1) I'm addicted to Scrabulous in a sick kind of way and could basically spend my whole life playing it if I let myself.
2) I've stopped caring about accumulating celebrity "friends". Friending up with these people has gotten me nothing!
3) Reconnecting with some people from my past has brought out some negative feelings in me: jealousy, regret, resentment. Instead of expressing these emotions, I have to write superficial things on their "walls" like, "Oh, I'm so happy for you, living in your beautiful space with your beautiful wife with your Canada Council grant and your gigantic studio and your insanely successful career"...
4) I've discovered that Facebook is a lazy man's pick-up joint. Facebook flirting is lame, lame. Lazy. Get off your ass, fellows! Go to a bar and flirt there!
5) Fun Walls are not fun. Fuck fun walls.
6) I don't want to look at people's family photo albums.
7) I end up in conversations with people on Facebook who would never normally send me an email or contact me. What's wrong with some boundaries? No, I don't want to catch up with my childhood classmate who has become born-again and hopes to save me via Facebook.
8) I have run out of witty things to say on my "status" line.
9) I don't ever want to be superpoked again.
10) Did I mention the Scrabulous addiction?

Here is a question for y'all: How do I gracefully remove myself from Facebook? Or, should I just rip myself off, like a bandaid?

Templates

I'm messing around with templates, and lost all my "favourites" in the process. I am hoping that by changing my template, I will be more inspired to write. Going for style over substance, in other words.

Aggie update and random thoughts

1) I'm still sick, but I won't blog about that because that's boring.

2) I am bracing for a big transition ahead: starting work next week, moving back to Ottawa, etc. You can bet I'll be calling an ESI emergency meeting to discuss--how to support Aggie while she goes through this rough transition.

3) I'm feeling ambivalent about blogging these days because I'm trying to reduce my screen time and do other things like a) cook
b) read c) get well d) sleep e) watch TV (it's a different screen, I know...) f) talk/communicate g) spend quality time with my person and cat unit h) make stuff out of fabric i) organize my life. I am aware that blogging itself doesn't take a lot of time. But, once I get on here, it's hard to get off. I'm definitely removing myself from Facebook. No point being on there now that I've reconnected with all my exes and discovered that they have become gay, breeders with SUVs, or really happy in some way that annoys me.

4) [Redacted] ... A rant about a friend getting married again, and me questioning that decision and the whole institution. I read what a wrote and I didn't like my tone. So .... redacted!

5) I'd better quit while I'm ahead.